February 1st 2015 was truly an awful awful day for all the New England Patriot haters out there. We all remember back in 2001 when Mo Lewis hit Bledsoe and the Tuck Rule! And we can’t forget the greatest kicker of all time doing this. I can’t believe I had to watch all of those videos, I need a vomit bag.
The Patriots were amazing and won 3 super bowls in Brady’s first 4 full seasons in the NFL but it took 10 years for Mr. Brady to take home his 4th super bowl and pretty much solidify his place in history as the greatest QB of all time. But check this out, look how good Brady has been over the last 10 years and his stats pre winning 3 super bowls and post. Brady never won a championship during the prime of his career, pretty amazing. Brady won 3 Super Bowls before he even met Gisele!!
|Pre 3 Super Bowls|
|Post 3 Super Bowls|
I highlighted the Super Bowl years in pink if you couldn’t pick that up. Brady deserves pink because he like Ugg’s. Then again I love my Ugg slippers so does that mean I like pink? Irrelevant. Brady has been absolutely ridiculous and it was about damn time he won another super bowl. I mean come on… Peyton Manning is the only one close to these statistics and the last time he was in the Super Bowl against the same team Tom Brady just beat, Peyton lost 43-8. But that’s none of my business. And AHHHHHHH the Pats were soooo close to BLOWING IT!! WHAT ARE YOU THINKING PETE CARROL RUN THE BALL ITS 2ND DOWN!!!!
All of this is kinda irrelevant but I find the stats interesting so I wanted to share with my friends. Now that the Patriots have won the Super Bowl again the rest of the AFC east decided to stop hitting the snooze button on their alarm and listened to the wise Samuel L Jackson.
They woke up and opened the checkbook! Look at how much activity has been going on between the Dolphins, Jets and Bills over the last week.
Lets start with the Bills. Doug Marrone opted out of his contract after the Bills actually had a pretty pretty solid year, their defense is awesome and now it will get even better with Sexy Rexy coming to town. Man I miss Rex already but he had to go, poor guy would love the Jets roster right now. Don’t freeze up there Rex! Doug Marrone….what a shmuck, now is the assistant head coach in Jacksonville after thinking he could quit on the Bills and get a better job. Enjoy Jacksonville LOSER!!
But then March 3rd comes around, I am at the Bobcats excuse me Hornets, Lakers game and I get a phone call from my friend Kevin telling me the Bills just traded Kiko Alonso who missed the entire season last year, he is a great linebacker but even without him the Bills D was narsty, for Shady McCoy and I’m like Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?! Bills makin some noiseeee…..and then they trade for Matt Cassel *crickets. That is a 2 minute video of cricket sounds, that’s how worthless Matt Cassel is. LeSean McCoy is an incredible player, maybe the best running back in the NFL. Big time statement by Buffalo to start the free agency frenzy.
They bring back Kyle Williams who had a great season last year starting 15 games and finishing with 5.5 sacks and then make a splash signing Percy Harvin to a 1 year 6 million dollar contract. I’m impressed, Rex must have had a strong impact on Percy last season. Why didn’t more teams go after him? Panthers are you going to do something, please?
Next up we have Snowflake and the Miami Dolphins. Here is a funny scene from Ace Ventura Pet Detective. Finkel is Einhorn!
I love that movie and I imagine this is how Dolphin fans have reacted watching their team play the last 10 years. The Dolphins made the first big splash signing wise signing the big fella from the Subway commercials! EAT FRESH OR I STEP ON YO HEAD
Ndamukong Suh, he is a monster. No wait suffering succotash he’s a MONSTAAR!
Suh solidifies an already solid defense and the thought of him and Cameron Wake next to each other scares me. Boo! Ah! Ok sorry, the Fins then go and snag Jordan Cameron who put up monster numbers in Cleveland a couple of years ago and is a very good Tight End. Charles Clay and Cameron will make for a strong tight end tandem if they retain Clay. Hmmm two tight ends, I wonder who started that trend…. Shhhh he’s in jail.
The Dolphins then acquired Saints wide out Kenny Stills and dumped Mike Wallace. I’d call it even, Jarvis Landry had a really good rookie season but it was overshadowed by the human highlight reel Odell Beckham Jr. Fins could use another receiver but they will be improved from last season with the Suh acquisition.
Now to my J-E-T-S who have been L-O-U-D this offseason. The New York Jets cleaned house last year and now are led by first time head coach Todd Bowles, Bowles was the Defensive Coordinator in Arizona last year. The Jets start the offseason by trading a 5th round pick to the Bears for Brandon Marshall…..uh no brainer. Then they get their prized jewel back from their archenemy…cue Skylar Grey. REVIS IS BACK!! I hadn’t worn that jersey in 2 years until the day after he was traded, what a great day.
Gang green re-signed defensive captain David Harris and then reunite Antonio Cromartie and his 47 children with Revis and bring in another strong corner in Buster Skrine. The Jets don’t stop there, they trade a 7th round pick in 2016 for the Harvard graduate, Ryan Fitzpatrick who is definitely better than Geno Smith and sign Marcus Gilchrist, a safety who started 16 games with the Chargers last season.
Needless to say new GM Mike Maccagaagagannananacanan (its really Maccagnan) didn’t like the Jets roster last season and made a few upgrades. Exciting week for Jets fans, as they will be relevant again this season. It will be interesting to see what the Jets do in the draft now that they traded for Fitzpatrick, do they want Mariota? I feel like his value is slipping and somehow he will end up on the Eagles like he should.
With all of these moves you would think the defending Super Bowl Champs would counter with some strong offseason moves of their own. However that has not been the case so far. The top 2 cornerbacks from last season Brandon Browner and Darrelle Revis are gone, Vince Wilfork for the time being is gone, Shane Vereen, gone. Akeem Ayers, cya! That’s a lot of big contributors from last year’s Super Bowl winning team. They were able to retain Devin McCourty and signed DE Jabaal Sheard. Both solid moves but nothing flashy. They also signed TE Scott Chandler.
The gap in the AFC East is closing and it took the Patriots winning their first title in 10 years to make it happen.
My question is, what the hell took so long?
Is it September yet?